Saturday, June 25, 2011

The blame

Blaming other people or circumstances seems to be the way that some people deal with conflict or unpleasant situations. When I think of a climate of blame in a conjugal relationship, I think that the marriage has a negative effect.Effects such as:

Fear of taking a risk.
Fear of taking responsibility.
Fear of making a decision.
Afraid to offer a different opinion.
Feelings of resentment.
Increaded emotional stress.
Decreased desire to communicate.
A sense of powerlessness and discouragement.
Decrease in passion and intimacy.

Fault in marital relationships, feelings of powerlessness, despair and misery for the spouse on the receiving end of all causes that guilt.

Blame protects a spouse and harms the other:

Blame allows a spouse to put the responsibility on their partner and everything that is different from himself. This means that the spouse should not experience the discomfort of watching their guilt or responsibility for the situation. If a spouse does not have to look at their guilt or responsibility which means that you do not have to change. This is the other person who needs to change … with problems and blame the spouse can stay in their comfort zone.

Abraham Maslow, said, "one can spend a lifetime assigning blame, finding the cause ' out there ' for all the problems that exist. This contrasts with the responsible attitude '' to confront the situation, badly or well and instead of asking, ' what caused the problem? Who's to blame? "asks ' how can I handle this situation to make the most of it? What can I save here? "

The next time the spouse fault instead of taking responsibility to tell him/her that fail to have a responsible attitude. And, in doing so, they fail to get the most out of the situation they can.

Related content:

The spouse call you names?
The spouse makes use of words to ashamed?
Scream your spouse, swear and scream at you?
Does your spouse use threats to intimidate you?
The spouse reject your feelings?
The marriage is making you sick?
Is your spouse verbally manipulate you?

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