Saturday, June 25, 2011

Parental alienation and PAS

Parental alienation is defined as the deliberate attempt by one of the parents of children from the other parent. An example would be the mother who share too much information about his father's affair with children in an attempt to provoke children towards the parent Port malevolence.

A mother or father might want to alienate children pay back to the grief experienced because of an unwanted divorce. May attempt to alienate the children due to mental illness that keeps the parent by putting the best interests of her children before them. The reasons parents participate in parental alienation are numerous and costly.

On the other hand, estrangement and follows more conflicts erupting between father and son, says expert report Irina Firstein. "We are extremely injured feelings," he says. "There are feelings of betrayal and disappointment."

The father leaves the family for another woman, neglects the time with his children and rejects the damage done to his children could become "estranged" from them. It's fair to say that nobody responds positively to poor treatment, least of all children.

PAS results from a parent working at causing hard feelings between a child and the parent. Estrangement results from a parent behaving badly towards her sons who, in Exchange causes children to cut the contact.

It is not uncommon that a parent who is estranged from children blame the other parent of PAS. It is easier to blame others for bad behavior rather than accept and recognize the bad behavior.

As one to tell the difference between a parent who is a victim of a step and one that is disconnected due to bad behavior? The behavior of his father during the period of alienation or otherness is a good indicator of what is really going on in a parent/child relationship.

Common behaviors to a parent alienated:

A parent who was alienated from her child will continue to pursue a relationship with the child. The parent will attempt to communicate on a regular basis, will send the emails and cards. The father will use the judicial system to fight the alienating parent and keep their legal rights to a relationship with their child.

The alienated parent is not a parent who surrenders or gives. David Goldman is a good example of what it will do a parent alienated in response to the alienating parent. His son was taken in Brazil by his mother who refused to return to the United States and sought a divorce in Brazil.

The Brazilian courts gave custody of the child's mother and former wife of David remarried, and she, her husband and new family used their status and influence to keep his son away from David. David spent five years fighting in Brazilian courts and finally regained custody of her son. No battle was too great, no expense too great for this father who had been alienated by his son.

Common behaviors to a separate parent:

The parent who is estranged from a child for her own bad treatment of the child has an attitude of "wait and see". They did not pursue a relationship with the child, because in their minds the baby that responsible for mending the relationship.

Estranged father will find it difficult or impossible to view the situation from the point of view of their child. You do not see their behaviour as a role in the problem; they feel entitled to misbehave with no repercussions.

More often not estranged father come in contact with in my work. These are people who go months at a time without contact with their children because they are wrapped in each other and spend time with another man/woman or busy building a new life after divorce. Do not understand why their children are waiting with open arms when they find time to fit them into their program.

One man in particular comes to mind. It never went to a school, has refused to enter into consultation with her children when the therapist suggested and spent six years with minimal contact with his children. According to him though his ex-wife is guilty of parental alienation.

His words when asked about the anger of his children to him were, "is what it is, and I can't change, I can only hope they arrive about a day." The alienated parent really would be jumping through hoops to try to reconcile with children. Estranged father cannot do such a thing, because doing so would mean admitting and taking responsibility and relationship with the child is not worth the inconvenience that would come to recognize the harm they have done for the parent/child relationship.

Parental alienation syndrome is dangerous for the emotional well-being of children and parental bond continued with a parent. Is too often used as an excuse by parents villains to justify to themselves the results of that bad parenting and offensive behaviour towards their children.

In both cases, innocent children suffer due to the inability of a parent to put the needs of their children prior to their own needs and if, as a parent can do that then maybe do not deserve a relationship with a child who is just trying to what every child has the right to expect, love, examination and evaluation by a parent.


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