Sunday, April 17, 2011

Thinking about divorce


I am 28 and have been married for 2 years. My wife and I are twins who are a little over a year old. Lately I find myself thinking of letting all the time. I feel trapped and how I die if I don't get out of this marriage.

My wife is a good person. She is a good mother and when we got married I thought it was perfect, the girl who had waited all my life. Now though I feel frustrated and angry. She refuses to work because she wants to stay at home with the girls. It seems that life has turned out that same day. I work, go home and listen to my wife about our girls, microwave broken or whatever else is wrong.

I want to be free! All I can think about is being free of responsibility. Living on my own without my wife brings concern. It is a phase or to act on my feelings and start life?



Jared, before you act on your feelings do some thinking about what life will be like after divorce. And what can cause negative feelings that you are having.

Firstly, why don't we talk about hard, cold facts? Divorce doesn't mean freedom from responsibility that you already have. Divorce means that you will live in a place separate from your wife and children. Once a divorce, you will still be financially responsible for the girls. The Court will be for you to pay child support.

Living separately, means that the costs of a resident of a second. You can afford to pay rent, electric cable, water and everything that comes with living on your own plus child support? Note also that you have privileges to visit with the girls. This means that you rent or buy a second resident that is large enough for a bedroom for them.

Once you're divorced your wife will return to work full-time. If you're working girls will guard. And if the girls are warned to be Court sentenced to ? of their expenses. You can bet to have two children in daycare is not cheap!

Before you even get that far, though, you have to get a divorce. You'll need a divorce lawyer that means pay lawyer fees. Your wife will need a divorce lawyer of his own, and since she is not working could be ordered to pay his lawyer fees. The average cost of $ 15,000 divorce. If you feel trapped now wait until they assume the financial responsibility of a father divorced.

Now, about those negative feelings that you are having. In the past 2 years, you've been through some major life changes. Marriage and twins is much for anyone to deal with! Could it be that I do not know how to deal with these changes.

I think you have a problem, but don't have the skills necessary to solve the problem. Without these skills, I'm not surprised that your first thought is to divorce. You've taken on a lot of responsibility in a short period of time. We are overwhelmed, and there is a good chance that you are suffering from problems with anxiety or depression.

Instead of thinking about the divorce, it should not be like marital advice? If you aren't feeling right about your marriage, mainly because the twins arrived, get a counselor and try to find solutions to problems in the marriage.

Talk with your wife, tell how you are feeling and ask her to go to therapy with you. The responsibility that you have now is nothing compared to the responsibility that you have if you divorce.

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